I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
