....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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