So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
