Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
