...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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