Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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