before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
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