why didn't you poke me back
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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