Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Randomize
