apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
