Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
