8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
