I think I am morally bankrupt
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Randomize
