I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I think I have vodka in my lungs
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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