I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
