Do vagina's smell?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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