thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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