used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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