WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
