I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
