it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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