i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
now i know why i became what i already was.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
