are you still at the devil's house?
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
