We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
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