We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I was not drunk enough for that final.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
