I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize