did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
