I don't usually arrange sex via text message
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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