i permit you to call me
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Randomize
