She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize
