Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
