he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
BRING THE BAGELS
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
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