hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
