Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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