Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
