...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Dignity is for republicans.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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