she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
