How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Come see our sink grown plant.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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