I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
i've created a new STD.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
