Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
