He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
