we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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