im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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