Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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