i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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