Got a toothbrush?
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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