I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Randomize
