erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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