I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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