Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
